Mister Longarm (Mister Longarms adventures Book 1)

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Matching that black leather was a gun belt with a double-action. In the watch pocket in his vest, Longarm carried a. Vail came around to the other side of the desk and seated himself in his comfortable swivel chair. Billy leaned back, the springs under the chair creaking loudly, and paused for a moment, steepling his hands beneath his chin. The boss had a round face, red complexion, and was bald as the proverbial boiled egg. He looked like a man who had spent his life pushing papers around the top of a desk.

In fact, Billy Vail was salty. A former Texas Ranger, he had smelled more than his share of gun smoke. There was not a thing he could ask one of his deputies to do that he would not have been perfectly capable of handling himself. Now Custis Long crossed his legs, folded his hands in his lap, and waited for the boss to say what was on his mind. And before you ask, my reluctance is not that I doubt your abilities. I hope you know better than that by now. Rather, this assignment might take some time, and I hate to give you up for that long.

Longarm grunted. Billy coughed into his fist. He bit the twist off the end and stuck the slim cigar between his teeth. The thing is, I want you to go to Springfield. Contact Jace. See what he wants you to do. He has travel vouchers and whatnot for you. The hansom cab pulled to a stop outside the hotel. Longarm dismounted first then helped Elizabeth to the sidewalk. Longarm handed the man a silver dollar to make sure he would be there when Longarm came back out, then he offered his arm to Elizabeth and squired her inside.

It has been a lovely evening, but our first. The first of many, I hope. Perhaps the next time your troupe plays Denver. Good night now. Playing the gentleman had its advantages, he had found. For one thing it confused a lady to have a man voluntarily do without a wrestling match. And confusing a woman was always a good idea. Moreover, it would intrigue her. And perhaps worry her.

Was there something wrong with her appearance? Did she have a body odor that turned the gentleman away? Longarm would let her stew on that tonight. And the next time she hit Denver, he would be certain to have her for the night. By his calculations, Jessica should be finishing her last performance just about now. If he hurried, he would get to the backstage door at approximately the same time that she was refreshed, dressed, and ready for an evening on the town. While the cab clip-clopped away into the night, Longarm walked up the narrow flagstone path to the front porch. As soon as his footsteps sounded on the boards, the door was flung open and a young woman motioned for him to come inside.


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Laughing, she took him by the arm and led him into the parlor. Longarm kissed her again, then took a step backward so he could look at her. And nice she was to look at, too. Janeth Peterson was perhaps in her upper twenties or early thirties—he had never asked—tall, slim, with hair the color of honey. She had sparkling brown eyes, lush full lips, and a healthy swell of breast. She was wearing a silk robe. Longarm reached forward and plucked the bow that tied her robe closed.

And dark vee of pubic hair below a soft, pale bulge of belly. She came into his arms again and reached up to kiss him. Then dropping her arms, she shrugged the robe off her shoulders. The silken material slithered to the floor. Longarm picked her up and carried her to the sofa. He sat, keeping Janeth in his arms, and most thoroughly kissed the lady. I was thinking about you instead of what I was doing up there. He fingered her pussy, and she quickly reacted with a shuddering climax that left her breathless and flushed.

Janeth recovered her breath and shivered, then slid off his lap to kneel on the floor at his feet. And taste it. Peeling his foreskin back, she ran her tongue around and around the red, engorged bulb of the head of his massive dick, then up and down the length of it. Going to, no. I want your body the first time. Janeth stood and took his hand. She pulled him off the couch and led him up a flight of stairs to her bedroom and to the big canopy bed. Talk Now! Time changes in U. Oral tradition and literacy: Changing visions of the world : selected conference papers, University of Natal, Durban, July In the Footsteps of Mr.

The Ambiguous Legacy: U. Foreign Relations in the "American Century". The Berlin Collection: Being a history and exhibition of the books and manuscripts purchased in Berlin in Crispin, A. Dick And Other Classic Stories.

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Ulrich von Hutten and the German Reformation, Yale historical publications. He lives on top of a hill and must go to Wobbletown at the bottom of the hill to do errands. He shouts to Mrs. Noisy's noisiness, Mrs. Crumb and Mr. Bacon come up with a plan. Next day, when Mr. Noisy goes shopping at both their shops again, Mrs. Bacon just pretend not to hear him. Noisy tries again at both shops, he realizes that he has to be quiet if he's to get what he wants.

He also learns not to clump his shoes, not to open and shut doors loudly, and he also learns to whisper.


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  • Noisy remains relatively the same in terms of appearance, though is given a megaphone-styled bullhorn to emphasize his character trait. His boots make loud stomping sounds when he walks. Quiet in a stereo-shaped house. Noisy is often paired with bad ones in order to remind them, such as Mr. Grumpy, Mr.


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    • Stubborn, Mr. Rude and Little Miss Naughty. He also blames people for being noisy even when it's his fault but he won't admit it, even a small whisper won't help as he has zero tolerance as shown in "Books", "Library", "Music", and "Movies". Nonsense is the 33rd book in the Mr. Nonsense lives in Nonsenseland, in a boat on top of a tree. When asked why he sleeps in a rowing boat, the answer is "I tried sleeping in a motorboat and it was somewhat uncomfortable. Nonsense is best friends with Mr. Silly, and when it snows yellow snow, they go for a toboggan in Mr.

      Nonsense's rowing boat bed. They build square snowballs somehow. Nosey is the 4th book in the Mr. The character of Mr. Nosey lives up to his name, along with his big nose. He is always snooping around in other people's business, much to their annoyance, so they decide to teach him a lesson by giving him a sore nose whenever he becomes too nosey.

      Afterwards Mr. Nosey is a changed person. In earlier illustrations Mr. Nosey's nose was much longer and less pronounced than it is in newer illustrations. On the TV series The Mr. Nosey Mr. Nosy in the US broadcast is light green, has a shape similar to that of Mr. Greedy , his nose is an orange oval, has one curl of hair, and wears a black necktie.

      He is also often seen with his best friend Mr. He may be stronger than Mr. Strong, and often when he jumps he breaks things, like in the Lake episode where he breaks the wooden platform. His catchphrase is "Just looking". He lives with Mr. Small in an observatory with a large telescope that comes out of the roof. Perfect is the 42nd book in the Mr. Everything about Mr. Perfect is just perfect. He never has a bad day or anything. He gets in trouble by Mr. Uppity and Mr. Quiet is the 29th book in the Mr. Quiet lives in Loudland, where everybody and everything is too loud for him.

      Loudland would be suitable for Mr. Noisy, but not for Mr. Quiet is scared. Quiet gets a letter from Mr. Happy to stay in Happyland, where Mr. Quiet gets a job in a library, where the rule is to always be quiet. Quiet is so happy he laughs out loud. Quiet is normal sized, instead of small like in the books, his colour has been changed from light brown to light blue, and two of his hairs are gone, He also lives next door to Mr.

      Noisy in a small shack-like house with a zen garden. His voice is barely audible, which can cause confusion with some of the other characters. In some situations where other characters he is with are debating, only he is aware of the dangers around them, even if he is subject to dangerous situations himself.

      He has a taste for Asian things, such as Chinese vases seen in "Music" and a Zen garden seen in "Gardens" , perhaps an allusion to the stereotype "quiet Asian". Rude is the 45th book in the Mr.

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      Men series by Roger Hargreaves and the second one created by Adam Hargreaves. Rude has a French accent alluding to the stereotype that the French are rude people and, as his name suggests, is rude to everyone. He insults a man with a big nose and an overweight woman. To the overweight woman he says "Fatty! Rude kept his red colour, dark red nose, French accent, and shape, but he doesn't wear a hat only in some episodes, which is rare. His catchphrase is, "I'll give you Man or a Little Miss will shout "Mr.

      Men and Little Misses that do this are Mr. Bump, Mr. Tickle, Mr. Small, Mr. In the episodes "Hotel" and "Inventions" Mr. Happy is in the crowd too. Rush is the 30th book in the Mr. Rush is always in a rush. He never does anything properly. He is in such a rush he has a terrible breakfast toast not toasted, water cold , only brushes one tooth, and runs out of the house to go nowhere. He sees an ad for a vacation in a magazine but can't go away because he has no money, so he wants a job to make money.

      Being a bus driver isn't good, because he doesn't stop at any of the stops, being a waiter isn't good because he'd whisk away the food as soon as he brought it. The job he finds is as a postman delivering express letters, the best job for the fastest thing on two feet. He saves enough money and goes on vacation. Scatterbrain is a new Mr. Man created for The Mr. A magenta Mr. Men character with a blue bowler hat and a wide collection of random items, though still the least intelligent. Unlike the other Mr. Men and Little Misses, his tongue is hot pink.

      He also has a lot of animal friends, ranging from penguins to iguanas. His catchphrases: "Why didn't you say so? His book counterpart is Little Miss Scatterbrain. Silly is the 10th book in the Mr. Silly lives in Nonsenseland, where the trees have red leaves and the grass is blue. Every year there is a contest for the silliest idea of the year, and Mr. Silly cannot think of one. All the animals do human activity and say the wrong sounds. Silly wins the contest by painting all the leaves on the trees green. In earlier printings of Mr. Men books on the back covers, Mr.

      Silly was cream with a red hat, but as of later printings he is light brown with an orange hat, like on the front cover of his book and the book's pages. Skinny is the 35th book in the Mr. Skinny lives in Fatland, where everything and everyone is big except for him. He has a small appetite, and sees Dr. Plump, who has him visit Mr. Greedy help increase Mr. Skinny's appetite for a month. Skinny gains a belly. Slow is the 39th book in the Mr.

      Slow does everything very slowly. It took him until New Year to open his Christmas presents, and until Easter to write his thank-yous. He tries to get a job. When he tried to be a news reporter, it took him until midnight to read the news. When he tried to be a taxi driver, he delayed Mr.

      Uppity in getting to the train station.

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      The job he gets is as a steamroller driver. Small is the 12th book in the Mr. Small lives under a daisy in Mr. Robinson's garden. He eats very enormous meals, and talks to Walter the Worm about getting a job. He then meets Mr. Robinson, who tries to get him a job. They try putting mustard in mustard jars, and they try putting matches into matchboxes.

      Neither job goes well. It's decided the best job for somebody so small is writing children's books. Robinson introduces Mr. Small to a friend who writes children's books referring to Roger Hargreaves , and writes a book all about himself.

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      This Mr. Men book breaks the fourth wall. Small is considerably larger about twice the size of a slice of bread and is an orange color. He also wears a tall black top hat similar to Abraham Lincoln 's instead of a blue bowler , is a somewhat egg shape and wears a pair of white sneakers. Bump , his favourite food is liverwurst sandwiches. He also is able to speak in French and Spanish. He behaves in a rather cheerful, gentleman-like manner and his catchphrases are "Good tidings" and "Great McGillicuddy!

      Nosey , and they live together in an observatory with a large telescope coming out from the roof. They also often pilot strange machinery that they themselves use. Sneeze is the 5th book in the Mr. Sneeze lives in Shivertown, the capital of Coldland, where everybody has a red nose from all the sneezing. Sneeze doesn't like sneezing all the time, and makes a long journey to where there is no sneezing. He meets a wizard to which he explains the story.

      The wizard transports the two to Coldland, and the wizard uses his magic to warm the place up. Nobody has red noses anymore, not even Mr. Snow is the 7th book in the Mr. Snow was an ordinary snowman until he was brought to life to help Father Christmas. The ending requires that the reader build a snowman properly next time he or she builds one because Father Christmas might want that snowman's help. Strong is so strong from eating many eggs, enough that he can break things, until he finds a farmer whose cornfield is on fire.

      Strong is so strong he picks up the farmer's barn and fills it with water, pours the water on the cornfield, extinguishing it. Strong is rewarded with eggs from the chickens on the farm. Strong's shape changed from a square to a triangle, however he kept his red color. He also wears a weight belt with a yellow buckle instead of his hat. He often says, "Yo" at the beginning of his sentences and he says "Aw, pickles! Strong speaks with a New York accent.

      Stubborn is a new Mr. He is purple and resembles Mr. Grumble, with a triangular yellow nose, and two hairs. He often assumes others are wrong, even when it is obvious that he is wrong. Little Miss Stubborn is his book counterpart. Tall is the 31st book in the Mr. Tall hates his oversized legs as they have too much muscle. Small, and when Mr.

      Small goes for a swim, Mr. Tall can't as he splashes all the water away. However, three other Mr.

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      Men teach him that over muscular body parts can be helpful. Tall decides his long legs are great for sprinting, and while Mr. Tall made it home quickly, Mr.

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      Small took a year to get home. He recently appeared in The Mr. Aside from keeping his looks from the books, he has a hat that's crooked at the top. Tall speaks with a Texan accent which is deeper than Mr. Strong 's and a Polish accent. Tickle is the 1st book in the Mr. Like all Mr. Men, Mr. Tickle has a simplistic look. He is orange with long arms and a small blue hat. In , for the 30th anniversary of the Mr. Tickle's book was released as a collector's edition hardback. It included a foreword from Adam Hargreaves.

      Tickle's story begins with him in bed and making himself breakfast without getting up because of his "extraordinarily long arms". He then decides that it is a tickling sort of day and so goes around town tickling people — a teacher, a policeman, a greengrocer , a station guard, a doctor, a butcher and a postman. The book ends with a warning that Mr. Tickle could be lurking around your doorway, waiting to tickle you. Tickle remains relatively the same in looks, though his hat has a stripe and his arms are normally sized, but can stretch out when needed.

      However, he tickles other Mr. Men and Little Misses due to the obvious absence of humans in Dillydale. As far as character traits goes, he is still determined to tickle everyone he interacts with, but instead of doing it for mischief he does it to make people happy and will stop when nobody wants him to tickle them, save for when the opportunity knocks with Mr. Grumpy , who appears to be his favourite target. He also gets his own catchphrase, "I think somebody needs a tickle!

      Tickle also featured in some of the other books, such as Little Miss Magic. In her story, she reduces his arms to normal length so he can no longer be annoying and tickle anyone. She eventually gives him his arms back when he begs for forgiveness and promises to reduce his actions to one tickle a day. However, he gets his revenge as soon as he is out of the room with his long arms and uses his one tickle for the day on her. Topsy-Turvy is the 9th of the Mr. Topsy-Turvy does everything the wrong way. One day he comes to the town where the reader lives.

      He rents a room in a hotel, speaking to the hotel manager the wrong way, "Afternoon good, I'd room a like. Everybody still speaks topsy-turvy, and the reader is asked to say something topsy-turvy. Topsy-Turvy originated from a competition run by Roger Hargreaves to find a new Mr Men character and was an idea by Marc Penfold who created Mr Upside Down and a story in which the character lived in a backwards world. The idea did not win the competition but Roger Hargreaves liked the idea so much he wrote to Marc Penfold saying he would use the idea and thus Mr. Topsy-Turvy was born.

      Uppity is the 11th book in the Mr. Uppity lives in Bigtown and he is very rich. He is rude to everybody they call him Miserable old Uppity until one day he meets a goblin. When he is rude to the goblin, the goblin shrinks Mr.